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2012: Ice Age


2012: Ice Age is The Asylum’s answer to Day After Tomorrow (which I pretty much love because I am a sucker for apocalyptic destruction of earth type movies) and wowza is it horrible on levels of epic proportions.  I mean, I love The Asylum, don’t get me wrong – it would kind of rock my world to be consistently in their movies – but c’mon, guys.  Really?  Really??

We start with a man in a car with his son and daughter.  He’s dropping the girl off at the airport so she can catch her flight back to college.  While he’s there he gets in touch with a dude in Canada (or something) who does something sciency.  Science guy tells Dad that a volcano is erupting and um…glaciers are going crazy?  Yeah, sure, let’s go with that.  Next is a race against time as a glacier (or glaciers?) start eating up the East Coast of the US and nature wreaks havoc.  I think.

As with most movies of this nature, the science is a bit…questionable.  Like when Mom, Dad and Brother are trying to call Daughter and Mom screams, “Why isn’t she answering her phone?  She’s on a plane!  Don’t they have wi-fi now??”  Um…WHAT??  I’m pretty sure there’s this whole law or rule or something about cell phones being off on planes that has nothing to do with wi-fi…unless I am the one who is getting the science and logistics wrong here…The weather is fun, ranging from snow and ice storms to hurtling winds to volcanic eruptions to earthquakes.  Lots of random people die and a whole bunch of nothing happens.  Finally, the US government and military declare war on the glacier.  Yes, that is a line in the movie – “You declared war on a glacier?”  Ha!

This will never be winning any kind of award like EVER but if you have a hankering for cheesy disaster sci-fi…well, really, skip this and go for something more fun.