2012: Ice Age

2012iceage

2012: Ice Age is The Asylum’s answer to Day After Tomorrow (which I pretty much love because I am a sucker for apocalyptic destruction of earth type movies) and wowza is it horrible on levels of epic proportions.  I mean, I love The Asylum, don’t get me wrong – it would kind of rock my world to be consistently in their movies – but c’mon, guys.  Really?  Really??

We start with a man in a car with his son and daughter.  He’s dropping the girl off at the airport so she can catch her flight back to college.  While he’s there he gets in touch with a dude in Canada (or something) who does something sciency.  Science guy tells Dad that a volcano is erupting and um…glaciers are going crazy?  Yeah, sure, let’s go with that.  Next is a race against time as a glacier (or glaciers?) start eating up the East Coast of the US and nature wreaks havoc.  I think.

As with most movies of this nature, the science is a bit…questionable.  Like when Mom, Dad and Brother are trying to call Daughter and Mom screams, “Why isn’t she answering her phone?  She’s on a plane!  Don’t they have wi-fi now??”  Um…WHAT??  I’m pretty sure there’s this whole law or rule or something about cell phones being off on planes that has nothing to do with wi-fi…unless I am the one who is getting the science and logistics wrong here…The weather is fun, ranging from snow and ice storms to hurtling winds to volcanic eruptions to earthquakes.  Lots of random people die and a whole bunch of nothing happens.  Finally, the US government and military declare war on the glacier.  Yes, that is a line in the movie – “You declared war on a glacier?”  Ha!

This will never be winning any kind of award like EVER but if you have a hankering for cheesy disaster sci-fi…well, really, skip this and go for something more fun.

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About mistylayne

I'm a Z movie loving, horror hound, Buffy quoting, Dr. Who watching, geekazoid and seeker of all things unusual. I'm a gypsy wanderer, lover of words, Wendy of the damned and all that jazz. What can I say? I'm complicated.

Posted on 2013.2.January, in American Cinema, Lo-Budget and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 26 Comments.

  1. Sounds dreadful, but welcome back Layne 🙂

  2. I think I might have seen this on ScFy. Not sure. Any word or review on your part about the film World War Z? The trailer looks great.

    • It is very forgettable, lol. I think World War Z will be pretty cool but as a fan of the book, I have to say that looking at the trailer the movie seems NOTHING like the book – seems like they mainly just took the name.

  3. Sounds wretched!!

  4. Declaring war on a glacier….it’s a funny image, the idea that the worlds most advanced army might be defeated by a lump of ice.

  5. Where’s Sid the Sloth and Manny the Mammoth in the trailer?

  6. Victor De Leon

    I’m glad these Asylum movies are on Netflix Instant. They are a pisser. Great post, amiga! 🙂

  7. Sounds bad – welcome back.

  8. Great write up. I hate, hate, hate, hate the Asylum. Didn’t I mention I hate them? I get horror films often knock each other off. But companies like this do give the genre a bad name. I will admit to enjoying Lincoln Vs. Zombies though. But in general Asylum is my kryptonite.

    By the way I will shoot you back an email later or tomorrow

    • *giggles* The Asylum is not for everyone much in the same way that Troma is not for everyone. 😉 I appreciate their rip off cheese factor but I think it’s usually done all in good fun. I could NOT get through Lincoln Vs. Zombies though…

      Got your email – will reply later after I get some work done!

  9. I can’t believe you made sense of an Asylum film. You deserve some type of award or something. Lol :p

  10. I have watched far too many of these films already 😀

  11. Oh Asylum…you know how to butcher a movie don’t you. I’ll be this is quite the gem. Can’t wait to see it.

And.........Action!

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