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6 Year Olds & Bruce Campbell

Me & the birthday princess!

Me & the birthday princess!

This past weekend I was out of town for a few days for my niece’s 6th birthday (hence why no posts still). Now, my niece Tay is a riot. This is the girl who told one of her grandmothers that she should dye her hair pink when said grandmother wanted to cover up the grey (that may or may not have been my influence, I really can’t say…) and the same girl who recently used “selfie” in a sentence (that one was ALL me – you’re welcome, world, heh). She’s also a total sweetheart; a reading rockstar and pretty much the light of my life (well her AND her little bro, can’t play faves!). This past weekend, however, we had THIS conversation that I thought you all would appreciate:

I have a bottle cap necklace I got at Horror Hound that says “I Love Bruce Campbell”. My Tay is learning to read and she’s pretty damn good at it.

Tay (reading my necklace as she and G’man -her little bro- examine it closely): I love…(tries to sound it out and gives up)…what does that say, Auntie Misty?

Me: Bruce Campbell. I love Bruce Campbell.

G’man: What’s a Bruce Campbell?

Me: Well, he’s a who, not a what and he’s an actor.

(G’man totally loses interest at this point.)

Tay: In what?

Me: (wondering just how badly her mother will kill me if I try to explain THE EVIL DEAD to the 6 year old in very watered down tones…figure it will be A LOT) In movies…and TV…boring grown up stuff though, you’d hate it.

Tay: Oh. Okay.

SEVERAL MINUTES LATER…(a cookie for you if you get that reference)

Tay (reading necklace again): I love Bruce…what was his name again, Auntie Misty?

Me: Bruce Campbell.

Tay: And you love him?

Me: Um…well, yeah, I like him a lot. He’s a good actor. (Easiest explanation to go with anyway)

Tay: What does he look like?

Me: Hang on, let me get a pic up on my phone. (Googles BC and finds a non-EVIL DEAD pic to show her) Here.

Tay: (looks at photo…looks at me…looks at photo) THAT’S Bruce Campbell?

Me: Uh, yeah?

Tay: (looks at me with a raised eyebrow) Really, Auntie Misty? (eye roll, sigh and shake of her head) Really?

The EXACT pic I showed her

The EXACT pic I showed her.

Sorry, Bruce Campbell, but the 6 year old is NOT impressed. *giggles* God, I love that girl.

And from here, just a note to say I finally seem to be caught up (mostly) on stuff and I’m not going out of town again for at least a couple of weeks and I HAVE been movie watching (AIMY IN A CAGE for one!) so reviews are coming and blog reading will actually be happening. And perhaps one day I’ll sleep as well…Catch ya on the flipside!

Lifelong Friends & Weddings & Happily Ever Afters

Stock Photo - NOT actual wedding day

Stock Photo – NOT actual wedding day

I *poofed* again. This time with good reason though. My best friend of the past 25 years got married this past Saturday and so this past week was crazy busy. I wish I could post a photo of her because she was absolutely gorgeous but suffice it to say, despite the fact that I loathe weddings with a fiery passion, it was a beautiful one and incredibly happy-making. :)

I just have a couple of more work things to catch up on and I’ll be good to go on jumping back into the Portland Film Fest films and my usual indies (and I’ve even watched a few things like THE BABADOOK here recently!). AND I’ll start making my rounds again (seriously guys, how do you manage to blog and read all those blogs and do everything else?? How did I used to do this? It’s insanity!). ;) I am also determined to fit in watching MAD MAX: FURY ROAD this week b/c dammit, I’m the only one who hasn’t seen it!!! Grrr-bunnies…

I’m hoping to fit in at least 3 films this week (*fingers crossed*) b/c I have a VERY important FROZEN themed birthday party to attend for my niece this weekend, so I will once again be busy.

Till then, though I’m sure you’ve already seen it, since I think this is totes amazeballs, I leave you with this brilliant editing job. Enjoy and happy Labor Day, guys! :)

New Reviews on the Way

I have new reviews on the way, I promise! Work is killing me though – NEVER WORK WITH CRAZY PEOPLE. Oy. This is me right now b/c of work:




And THIS is the rainbow from yesterday:

*middle fingers*

*middle fingers*


I was totally all “Eff you!” and “Where’s my leprechaun?” and “Aren’t unicorns supposed to be eating you??” (despite taking a picture of it, ahem). ;)

Back to reviews though, we have AUFDRUCK/LABEL; “Please Punish Me” (kinky!); Messiah and The Perfect House coming your way (and more b/c I have finally caught up on some shiz, yay!). So anyway, sorry, I’m trying, bear with me, please if you’re so inclined.

<3’s & rainbows & all that crap!

February Rogue is Here – You Know You’re Excited!


It’s that time of month! (Ew no, not THAT time of month…) I only had 3 films this month for Rogue but they were quite possibly the widest range of films I’ve ever had to review at one time – witch hunts to aliens to Lifetime on crack…it was an interesting (and sometimes confusing) time. Stop by and check it all out!

What happens in the life of a single park bench? A LOT, that's what!

What happens in the life of a single park bench? A LOT, that’s what!


This one explores the ghosts of the past and involves alcohol, ALL the alcohol.

This one explores the ghosts of the past and involves alcohol, ALL the alcohol.


Freaking awesome short film that really packs a punch - chocolate chip cookies are extra.

Freaking awesome short film that really packs a punch – chocolate chip cookies are extra.

What’s This? Another Issue of Rogue Cinema? For Realsies??

We Love Rogue! (Because that's where Misty writes, hehe). ;)

We Love Rogue! (Because that’s where Misty writes, hehe). ;)

A saint with a serious problem.

A saint with a serious problem.

An interview with Kyle Hytonen - the genius behind "Massacre at Femur Creek"!

An interview with Kyle Hytonen – the genius behind “Massacre at Femur Creek”!

How does a 70 year old gay man find love?

How does a 70 year old gay man find love?

Interview with filmmaker Pascal Payant

Interview with filmmaker Pascal Payant

You NEED to watch this film. Malibu Action Girl to the rescue!!

You NEED to watch this film. Malibu Action Girl to the rescue!!

Can't lie. My absolute favorite of the bunch. We are ALL kickawesome.

Can’t lie. My absolute favorite of the bunch. We are ALL kickawesome.

Missing The Office? (That...that did end, right?) Then try this web series!

Missing The Office? (That…that did end, right?) Then try this web series!

Classic Movies Project: The Thing


For my first classic movie I have oddly enough never seen, I went with The Thing (so now people can stop yelling at me all the time about not having seen it ;)).  I’d previously seen the prequel/remake (was it a prequel?  Or was it a remake?? Didn’t they bill it as a prequel but it was really just the same thing but with a chick?) and I pretty much dug it but man, was this intense!

I am NOT a fan of THIS.

I am NOT a fan of THIS.

I assume I can pretty much skip the recap (aliens, y’all – big nasty motherfucking aliens) so I’ll break it down into The Good and The Bad.


Dude, Kurt Russell is pretty much the BOMB.  And um, oddly kinda of really hot.

Old school makeup and camera tricks beat out CGI pretty much any day of the week.  Those aliens were freaky as hell.  And seriously, why, oh why do creepy things always have to do the even creepier backwards crab walk thing??  Why??  :(

That one dog near the beginning when the alien first appears – you know when all the dogs are locked in that cell thing – the dog that takes one look at the alien and says, “Fuck this shit.” and starts tearing out the bars so it can escape.  That was AWESOME.

Major tension.  I was deeply unsettled the whole way through.  Like nervous in the pit of my stomach unsettled.

Super gross.  I actually got really hungry about halfway through this and kept wanting to go get food but then something incredibly, wickedly disgusting would happen and yeah…food was not an option.


All those poor puppies!  :(  Sad making.

While this left me unsettled, the remake thing actually had me a little scared.  No idea what the difference there was except that the backwards crab walking alien was WAYYYY more amped up and dramatic in the remake and it freaked me the hell out.  But this didn’t scare me.

I was totally bored throughout the beginning – say the first 30 minutes.



So the final verdict?  Entirely enjoyable.  I can totally see why it gained cult status and I can totally see how all my friends that actually saw this movie when they were kids were terrified of it.  Probably not one I’ll revisit but definitely glad I finally saw it.

The Monster Squad – Nostalgiathon 2012

Yay Nostalgiathon!  In case you’re looking for even more nostalgia, head on over to the Nostalgiathon 2012 page to all the latest entries – there’s some super fun stuff there!

On an unrelated note, I’m in a show that opens this weekend which of course means a full week of tech and dress rehearsals so I will be around all spotty like.  And let’s not even talk about January just yet.  It’s gearing up to be a wild ride…

The back story:

Once upon a time, there was a wee lass named Misty who was all of seven years old. Misty’s parents thought it would be absolutely delightful to show her a little film called The Monster Squad.  Why would they do this?  Who knows?  Unfortunately for Misty’s parents, this experiment did NOT end well.  As a matter of fact, the wee lass sat up ALL NIGHT LONG refusing to sleep because she KNEW that at any moment Dracula would walk through her bedroom door and do something horrendous.  And as we all know, if a wee one doesn’t sleep, the adults don’t sleep.  This was the occasion that led to the horror movie ban in Misty’s life, the ban that would not be lifted until her sixteenth birthday.

Don’t mess with these muthas!

The Now:

I revisited The Monster Squad (Two-Disc 20th Anniversary Edition) specifically for Nostalgiathon.  I literally had not seen it since that oh so wonderful viewing at the age of 7 and my memory mostly consisted of the traumatic aftermath.  When asked about this film before curling into the fetal position, I would simply say, “Classic movie monsters come back and kids have to fight them.”

First, I’d like to say…Mom & Dad, what the hell were you thinking showing me this???  Dracula picks up a 5 year old girl by the chin and calls her a bitch – how was I not supposed to think he had a deeply intense hatred of tiny children of the female variety and would hunt me down?  Sheesh!  (Btw, I do so totally love my parents, I just don’t know what they were thinking here.  *giggles*)

Second, this movie is absolutely a classic.  Awesome kids, great one-liners and an all around good time – way perfect for adolescent boys especially, methinks.  And ah, the 80s when kids could curse like sailors and check out scantily clad women in the movies all while smoking ciggies or being smoked around.  Such a simpler time…*sighs*

My name is HORACE!!

This is one I just sort of assume everyone has seen but if not – well…classic movie monsters come back and kids fight them.  See, my hazy memories were correct.  ;)  It’s kinda like The Goonies (which I love) but with some real drama.  The old German guy for one?  Had no memory of that and when I saw him talking about monsters, it kind of broke my heart a little.  I was NOT expecting something like that to be in a “kids'” movie.


If I had watched this when I was oh, say 12, I would’ve been head over heels in love with Rudy.  He was such a bad ass.  12 year old Misty would’ve *swooned* over that kid.  ;)

Eugene: Is she a versgin?
Scary German Guy: Yes, she can do it!
Patrick: She can’t read, she’s five years old!
Scary German Guy: I’ll help her!

EVERYTHING about the above exchange cracked me up.  Just EVERYTHING.

That freaking adorable dog.  So cute.

Frankenstein for the WIN!

Not gonna lie, through jaded adult eyes some of the middle got a bit boring but overall one fun ride and definitely worth the revisit!

Extra Features Podcast


Some (if not all of you) have been participators in Head in a Vice’s Desert Island Films feature (and if not, please go check it out especially if you’re fond of learning more about your fellow bloggers because it is great fun and super insightful!).  Well, Tyty (ha, no longer your birthday!) has recently hooked up with the guys over at Extra Features, a movie review podcast that’s great fun.  They’ve featured a couple of the Desert Island Films lists from his site and in their most recent podcast they featured mine!  Thanks, guys!!!  The list is featured near the end but the whole podcast was fun as they discuss a plethora of horror movies (including Nightmare on Elm Street!!).  I’ve also been chatting with them via Twitter the past couple of weeks and from what I can tell they are megacool.  So if you’re into podcasts, check these fellas out!

And you can check out their most recent episode featuring my Desert Island Films list HERE!  Thanks again, guys!!  This was highly enjoyable and I will definitely keep listening in!


Shakespeare it’s not, but Buttcrack is also not the most horrible movie I’ve ever seen.  I’d almost call it “bordering on this side of decent.”  But then I also watch a lot of weird ass movies.

So what’s it about you ask?  Well, it’s about friendship and roommates, preacher men and witches, zombies and buttcracks.  This film packs in a whole heck of a lot in its 68 minutes.  Sadly, however, it’s still not quite enough to satisfy this girl.

The story (what little there is of one) follows a pair of roommates.  One’s a decent sort of fella (we know this because he has a girlfriend and clothes that fit) and the other?  Well, the other is slovenly and constantly has his crack on display. Mr. Decent and his girlfriend finally reach the point where they can no longer stand Mr. Buttcrack and after what may be the lamest marriage proposal in the history of the world and a nice little vomiting scene, Mr. Decent accidentally (“accidentally”?) kills Mr. Buttcrack by dropping a radio in a tub.  Oh but wait!  Mr. Buttcrack has a sister who’s a witch and she brings him back to life so all can experience ZOMBIE BUTTCRACK!!!!!  Muahahahahaaaa!  What more could one want from a movie?  Just for extra measure, there’s also a very strange, slightly creepy preacher man (who actually refers to himself as “Preacher Man”), the scariest clown portraits you’ve ever seen and the lamest “1 Year Later” sequence ever.  And there you have it.  Clowns, preachers, witches, buttcracks and zombies all rolled into one little film.

I can’t recommend this movie but neither can I give it a “Run Away Screaming Rating”.  Watch at your own risk and consideration.  And remember, “We’re all zombies in the end!”


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